Bruh…fam…dude…son…BRUH! Scandal episode 4x04 “Like Father, Like Daughter” was the SHIT! No scratch that, it was THAT SHIT! So much good stuff happened in this episode. I’m not going to hold you, I was a little excited for this episode because I knew that it was going to be Fitz heavy but my Drake like trust issues with the Shondaland camp would not allow me to get fully happy & allow myself to indulge in what I knew was going to make me a very happy(& moist) woman. My expectations were lower than a gas tank on E so this episode turned out to be a very pleasant surprise for me. THIS WAS THE BEST DAMN EPISODE IN SEASON 4 & CAN’T NOBODY TELL ME OTHERWISE.
So lets just start on in & get this minimal, miscellaneous, non-motherfucking factor shit out of the way first so that I can concentrate on what REALLY matters: FITZGERALD THOMAS GRANT III AKA TONY GOLDWYN(ANTHONY HOWARD GOLDWYN)!
- So Rowan Eli & Jake still trying to one up each other in who really fucking gives a squirrel’s nut sack.
- Jake still DeeBo’ing the fuck out of David Rosen.
- Jake & Olivia are somewhat back on that pretending it what’s real shit.
- Red aka Gabby aka Abby continue to work at the white house but not be in the damn bubble.
- Huck & Quinn got Omarion’s Icebox where their love for Abby use to be.
- Oh, Jake blew up a car.
- They have a New Karen & honey, chile, girl, boo, I simply cannot.
- Olivia showed up, was alive(she been real cold & dead inside to me), & read for filth. She handled the fuck out of New Karen’s case & made sure the sorry people behind it knew she was not the one to be fucked with.
- Tom the fucked up now(he getting questioned about Jerry’s death).
- Rowan Eli continues to be that dude. He had Tom so shook, he said Jake gave the order to kill Jerry.
- Jake finally got DeeBo’d. He was arrested for ordering Jerry’s death. The secret service rolled up on him like the end of Ron Isley’s Contagious video. Shit was quite hilarious if I do say so myself.
(Well I care about BOSS ass Olivia but she had to go up there with rest of the stuff because that’s where that part of the episode fell)
What happens in this episode is New Karen gets her ass in trouble & calls Olivia. New Karen snuck her ass out of boarding school, commandeered a private jet belonging to some girl who she barely knew but that she went to school with father. She was 500 miles away from school& at a party were she not only was drinking & smoking pot but also she shot up some shit.
New Karen also in her state of little bratty rich kid needing an old school black granny ass whoopin’, she also let two fellas tag ya’ man 360 dance studio style as they doubled teamed her. Yup, young New Karen was recorded having sex with 2 boys as rapper Future would say, “At the same damn time.”
Olivia & Quinn with the help of Huck aka OPA manage to get white girl wasted New Karen out of the party unnoticed. We are now in the oval office and Fitz(or as I like to call him, BIG DADDY LONG DICK ME DOWN GRANT) is furious. He is yelling, veins busting out of places that make you think of what veins in other places look like
(& by other places for me, I mean his dick). He is pissed to high hell that his daughter out her THOTing up for the basic DC boys. Fitz knows that she was drinking & possibly high on something so he calms himself enough to ask her if she had been raped. Because if she was, they would find the boys & make them pay.
Ol’ THOTy ass New Karen then snaps on her daddy talking about, nah homie, I can get dick. I dicked them down real good & shit son. Not these exact words but New Karen was trying to white Conner the fuck out of Fitz—we all know white Conner, he is the 16 year old suburban white kid who yells, “Shut up mom. I fucking hate you” over her getting froot loops over fruity pebbles & shit. New Karen thought Fitz name was Sarah—we all know Sarah, she is white Conner’s 45 year old mother who after Conner cuss her ass clean the fuck out, she cries & goes to get the right cereal for spoiled brat ass, bitch ass Conner. New Karen had the Kevin Hart life lesson of the century when Fitz stood up with a, “You little…”
Quiet as it’s kept, Fitz was about to Sweetpea from Baby Boy the fuck out of New Karen. He was about to call her out her name. New Karen was about to be called an unstable creature & whatnot cause Fitz ain’t gone say the B word(but quiet as it is kept, Fitzgerald forgot who New Karen was for a second & she was about to be a little bitch & I ain’t mad at that shit). So light skin Anthony Tyrone Goldwyn showed up with the power of his brother Goldwizzle’s twitter handle to fuck New Karen up.
Olivia stepped in at the right moment, saving New Karen for the second time that night. She talked Fitz down off the male Mommie Dearest ledge with some reason, stating how New Karen had to get her cooter cat checked after a night of being THOTiful.
Fitz comes down & tells New Karen to go & after she comes back from the white house doctors to go straight to her room. New Karen leaves & Fitz is talking about how he need to put her ass in a convent with nuns & shit. Olivia says some bullshit about how that didn’t work for her & how she understands being a grieving girl with daddy issues.
They always trying to make young Olivia look like she was a ho fo sho.
Fitz goes on to say that this is his daughter to which Olivia says some shit about every girl is someone’s daughter or someone’s child or some shit. I really can’t think straight with Tony standing there in that tight as polo type shirt with his nipples hard as quantum physic & shit.
Anyway, Fitz then goes on to give his best Jodeci’s Cry For You impersonation when he asks Olivia with hands clasped together to handle this for him in the only way that Olivia Pope can.
I kid you not all I heard when Fitz was talking was: “Baby, I’m begging. Baby, I’m begging, begging baby. Baby, I’m begging. Baby, I’m begging, begging baby. Baby, I’m begging. Baby, I’m begging, begging baby.”
The next day, Fitz takes New Karen to see tired ass Mellie. Mellie is sitting up there in the same housecoat, eating cereal.
So she getting paid thousands of dollars to act this same shit 4 episodes in a row?
They say hello & Fitz tells Mellie that New Karen had some free time so she came down to visit(Tony also kissed New Karen on the top of the head…I haven’t disliked a bitch more since Stringer Bell was fucking Donette in that damn “I’m an XL” scene in The Wire).
Fitz tells Mellie that New Karen is going to spend some time in the oval with her dad(BITCH, I’M TRYING TO SPEND SOME TIME IN THE OVAL WITH HER DAD TOO—HOW CAN I DO THAT? HOW DO I GET MY DADDY TIME WITH FITZ IN THE OVAL? I GOT A GREAT & MIGHTY NEED FOLKS). Fitz pulls New Karen away & off we go to explore New Karen’s THOTy adventures.
We are now in the presidential campaign meeting room place & there is a wall of boys & New Karen trying to figure out who she fucked & sucked the night prior.
They go through a wall of motherfuckers & New Karen is able to identify one boy because he had a tattoo.
Quinn goes & roughs the dude up. He works at Getty’s burger. No one(read ME) cares. Let’s talk about Fitz some more.
Olivia comes into the oval(I don’t know what for & I really don’t give a shit why she is there because look…FITZ)! Fitz is being an awesome president & holding meetings & running the country & whatnot while Olivia does her, you know fixing New Karen’s bullshit. Fitz takes a break & Olivia informs him that they have found one of the boys. Fitz goes on to say something about him thinking that sending her back to school & getting her back into routine was the right thing to do.
Olivia: “Burying yourself in work isn’t always the best thing when you lose someone.”
Fitz: “Running away isn’t always the best thing either.”
Me: HERE WE GO.
Fitz: “You were having a difficult time.”
Olivia: “We were all having a difficult time.”
Fitz: “I’m sorry…about your mother.”
Olivia: “No. She did a terrible thing, don’t apologize. She..ruined your family. She ruined my family…She ruined us.”
I was dreading this shit like a test that I didn’t study for. I didn’t want this conversation because I feel like both Olivia & Fitz aren’t ready for this shit. Hell, I know I wasn’t not ready for this shit. But it happened & if I must say so myself, it went pretty well or at least I thought the scene was well.
A couple of things: (1) I like that Olivia initial told him that she went alone & (2) I loved the whole “No. She did a terrible thing, don’t apologize. She..ruined your family. She ruined my family…She ruined us.” line.
I like that Olivia initially lied to him because it showed me a small human side of her—it showed me that she cares. Since she has been back, one of my main problems with her is that she seems so cold(her attitude towards the members of OPA & her still attitude with Abby). Her lying to him was the first time that I felt like I saw something real from her this season. She still cares enough about his feelings to spare them with a little white lie.
I loved the “No. She did a terrible thing, don’t apologize. She..ruined your family. She ruined my family…She ruined us.” line, especially the “She ruined my family…She ruined us.” part. I love it because the “She ruined my family” has a double meaning to me. It is both her childhood family & her future family that she could have had with Fitz. I love this part also because I understand it. Olivia saw the house in Vermont & a life that she could possibly have with Fitz only to have all of that mess with her mom ruin it. I understand her feeling like Fitz could never love her after knowing that her mother(well one of her parents) killed his child. I understand her emotion & her thought process so I love to words that come with it because anyone in their right mind would be thinking the same thing. How could someone love me after someone in my family caused literally the worst thing that could ever happen to a person? Fitz lost a child & it is believed to be at the hands of her mother so I get it. I understand & it made me okay with this scene & the conversation even though I was dreading it.
So I think the next scene was that after Olivia left the oval, she walking down the hall on the phone with Jake when she sees Mellie coming in the opposite direction towards her. Olivia turns quickly telling Jake that she has to call him back. Mellie simple ass then screams Olivia’s name & runs down the hall after her.
Mellie then asks Olivia what she is doing in her house. Olivia tells her to ask Fitz & then Mellie touches her.
In all seriousness, I am so fucking tired of this shit. I have been silent for a while because I don’t feel the same passion & connection that I once felt with the characters on this show so I didn’t see the point in arguing or fighting for something that I am not passionate about but enough is e-fucking-nough. Why is everyone just able to put their hands on Olivia? Seriously, this shit is disrespectful. She is a person. She has a life. She fucking matters. Talk, speak words but don’t put your hands on me & even then know that you not gone speak to me anyway either. I need this to stop. I know folks was talking about the way that she looked at Mellie’s hand but that was not enough for me. I need her to at least be vocal when shit is being done to her. I need her to use her fucking voice. Speak up or smack a bitch. Now I know she can’t smack Mellie being that she is the first lady and they in the white house & whatnot but I need her to read motherfuckers like she read Edison. I need her to come with that Beyoncé 5,4,3,2,1 countdown type of read. She can’t smack the dog shit out of Mellie but I needed Olivia Pope to have been like:
Five: Remove your hands off of me.
Four: If you value them & your life, I suggest you never touch me again.
Three: That was not a threat, it was a promise.
Two: DO NOT FUCK WITH ME. You will come up missing.
One: I got Annalise Keating on speed dial so I do know How To Get Away With Murder.
I just really need Olivia to use her words. You work in the communication field, can you please stop going mute when someone mistreats or touches you? I mean shit. She get BIG on all the wrong people(Abby, Fitz, hell even season 2 Edison didn’t deserve to have his asshole ripped open bare) but you know Jobless Jacob & Melodramatic ass Mellie get a fucking pass. Sure chew out the man who was a good normal dude who asked you to marry him twice but you know the man who talks down to her & only speaks to her when she fucking or saving him gets a pass. She chew out the man who loves her enough to build her a home but the bitch that calls her a whore, she good.
Now that I have an understanding of the way shit is going let me go back to being Kermit & shit.
After that scene, Melodramatic ass Mellie moseyed her as down to the oval trying to start shit.
Fitz & Cyrus in the oval minding their own business, running a country & shit & here come Melodramatic ass Mellie. Cyrus showed why he is forever one of my main bitches because when he first saw Mellie, he said, “Hello, Mellie. You got some new boots there, new color.”
Mellie is all like, “You said you would warn me, about you seeing Olivia Pope.”
For a second, Fitz & Cyrus both had mirroring expressions of knowing that this was about to be a bullshit ass conversation if they ever knew one. Cyrus like, let me go & proceeds to get out of this shit because like Kermit, this too is none of his business.
Shout out to the background actors especially the girl because she did the BEST let me get the fuck out of here before I even come in here walk away turn around the door. It was mugs of Kermit none of my business tea going around.
So this happens:
Mellie: “I want to know why the hell do you have Olivia Pope in my house.”
Mellie: “Why did you bring Olivia here?”
Fitz: “I didn’t bring her here.”
Mellie: “Right. A magical fairy granted your wish and poof, Olivia Pope appeared in the oval office.”
Mellie: “Or you made one of your late night masturbating late night phone calls and she came running over.”
Fitz: “I didn’t call Olivia. Karen did.”
Fitz: “Karen got into some trouble last night. There was a party, she got drunk, things got…you should be glad she called Liv.”
Mellie: “I should be glad?”
Fitz: “Liv got her out of there. She’s handling the situation.”
Mellie: “I should be glad.”
Fitz: “Mellie, focus.”
Mellie: “I am the mother. This is not her family. This is my family. I am the one who picks up the pieces. I am the one who holds this family together. I want her out of here. You get Olivia Pope out of here.”
Mellie: “I don’t want her anywhere near my child. I will fix this. I will make the decisions. You know what, you just stay out of it.”
Fitz: “I have dealt with drunk Mellie, bad hygiene Mellie, no wait I got it, smelly Mellie. I have dealt with drunk Mellie and smelly Mellie and screw everything to hell Mellie and crybaby Mellie and eat everything that is not nailed down Mellie and I have not complained. But I will NOT put up with whatever righteous, history rewriting Mellie you have going on right here, right now. This is not your family. You are not the mother. Not since Jerry died. Since Jerry died, you have abdicated your role. You have mothered no one. You hold nothing together. You pick up no pieces. You know how I know this, because baby Teddy thinks his mother is nanny Jen and Karen spent last night in a threesome with two guys doing a move on her that they like to call EIFFEL TOWERING! You know how I know that? I saw the sex tape they made. So you should be damn glad she called Olivia because Olivia Pope is fixing this mess. This mess that you made, this mess that we made. Look, I know that I share some guilt in all of this but you want to know the difference between you and me? All day, every day, I am running a country. I am grieving for the lost of my son but I am also running a country! ALL DAY, EVERY DAY, YOU ARE SITTING AROUND IN BOOTIES AND A DIRTY ROBE EATING CHIPS AND GETTING DRUNK AT 11am!”
Mellie: “A sex tape.”
Mellie: “She takes after her daddy then, doesn’t she?”
Fitzgerald channeled the spirit of a Beyoncé releasing an album exclusively on iTunes that no one is ready for with that read. He snatched her balder than a cancer patient. There will be no growth for the next two months after that read.
He came for her life by the way of her ancestors. Fitzgerald, snatched her great-granddaddy with that read. Mellie great-grandfather spirit is somewhere right now talking about, “Get up off me, Fitzgerald. Let me go.”
He told her that her Sahara Desert cooch smelled like possum pussy & the bottom of under the sea.
Fitzgerald read her so hard I touched my scalp to make sure hair was still nestled in its right place, it was.
Fitzgerald, what has gotten into you?
I was watching this scene like that one crazy person who loves fighting so much that when their friend or family member beating somebody up they be like, “Yeah, I like that. Get that shit.” That was me this whole time. I was egging Fitz on like, “That’s what I like to see Fitzgerald! Get that. DRAG HER! FINISH THAT BITCH!”
Fitz fucked around & caught a
“I have dealt with drunk Mellie, bad hygiene Mellie, no wait I got it, smelly Mellie.”—Fitzgerald Thomas ‘DRAG-A-BITCH’ Grant III
“I have dealt with drunk Mellie and smelly Mellie and screw everything to hell Mellie and crybaby Mellie and eat everything that is not nailed down Mellie…”—Fitzgerald Thomas ‘DRAG-A-BITCH’ Grant III
“This is not your family. You are not the mother. Not since Jerry died. Since Jerry died, you have abdicated your role. You have mothered no one. You hold nothing together. You pick up no pieces. You know how I know this, because baby Teddy thinks his mother is nanny Jen and Karen spent last night in a threesome with two guys doing a move on her that they like to call EIFFEL TOWERING! You know how I know that? I saw the sex tape they made. So you should be damn glad she called Olivia because Olivia Pope is fixing this mess.”—Fitzgerald Thomas ‘DRAG-A-BITCH’ Grant III
I just want to take a second to give props on this part of the read because Fitzgerald did not only read & educated a bitch but he had receipt proof with his whole, “You know how I know this, because baby Teddy thinks his mother is nanny Jen and Karen spent last night in a threesome with two guys doing a move on her that they like to call EIFFEL TOWERING! You know how I know that? I saw the sex tape they made.” part because I now know that I need to just watch nanny Jen & Teddy interact & see Karen sex tape as proof of purchase on this read. This shit was a looooooooong time coming & I personally want to clap it up for Fitz not making this shit a diet read. This shit was not lite.
Oh & about the whole Eiffel Tower thing…
New Karen is nasty.
“This mess that you made, this mess that we made. Look, I know that I share some guilt in all of this but you want to know the difference between you and me? All day, every day, I am running a country. I am grieving for the lost of my son but I am also running a country!”—Fitzgerald Thomas ‘DRAG-A-BITCH’ Grant III
Yeah, he right.
“ALL DAY, EVERY DAY, YOU ARE SITTING AROUND IN BOOTIES AND A DIRTY ROBE EATING CHIPS AND GETTING DRUNK AT 11am!”—Fitzgerald Thomas ‘DRAG-A-BITCH’ Grant III
Then Melodramatic ass Mellie gone try to get the last word talking about Karen take after her daddy because there is a sex tape.
Nah bitch, nah! You got read by LeVar Burton’s reading rainbow & you won’t ever see new growth so you getting the last word don’t mean shit.
Fitz never had a sex tape. It was all an audio recording & the last time I checked, Karen walked in on you
So again: Nah bitch, nah!
So OPA manages to track down the other boy & Olivia goes to meet with his parents—who just so happens to be the most stupid ass motherfuckers that I know. They want 2.5 million to not release the sex tape with Karen on it.
So after meeting with those assholes, Olivia goes to inform Fitz of what they want. He laughs it off, shocked that someone would try to blackmail the president. Olivia tells him to pay them. Fitz wonders what kind of parents they are & Olivia tells him that there are plenty of bad parents out there. Fitz says how he is failing as a father & as a husband & then this happens:
I can’t. I’m upset. Who the fuck does Tony Goldwyn think he is? Seriously, I need answers or my one because this shit ain’t right. How could he? What the fuck? Jesus, Lord! What? Why? HOW????
We really need to have a discussion about Tony Goldwyn. Bruh. Like he rude as fuck. He smooth as fuck. And the level of sexual frustration that this dude makes me feel, IT IS NOT FUCKING FAIR. I didn’t do nothing to him & I am going through serious angst over this dude. He makes me feel stuff I ain’t felt in a long time. This motherfucker…I clench parts of my body & my lower stomach gets tight on sight so all this extra shit he do is not needed. Like he is so smooth for no damn good reason. He brings all 54 years of suave, sexy to this damn roles. Y’all not understanding me. I know he can demolish the cooter cat. Like he gone knock the pussy out like fight night!
Tony be like: “I’m a knock the pussy out like fight night. Hit it with the left(stroke). Hit with the right(stroke). I’m a knock the pussy out like fight night. Beat it with the left(stroke). Beat it with the right(stroke). I’m a knock the pussy out like fight night.”
Okay, now that I got that out, let’s take this shit gif by gif.
It is the way that he comes up on her. It is slow & not rushed & then BAM! He pulls her in, hell, he pulled ME in…sir, how dare you? How dare you?
The way that he grabs her & holds her into him. It is so possessive like he just knows THIS IS HIS WOMAN.
The pure sex an intensity that I feel from him through my screen. You have no choice but to be pulled in.
Do you see the smooth ass way he slide in there & undid her jacket?
(I’m not gone talk about how he grazed her nipple)
Listen…he talking in the breathy baritone voice, looking down on you with the intensity of a man getting his first drink of ice water after walking the Sahara Desert.
“Didn’t you miss me?”
*moans* Nigga, HELL MOTHERFUCKING YES! I MISSED THE FUCK OUTTA YOU. I MISSED YOU SOOOOOOOOO MUCH!
*clean up in aisle my bedroom*
He is in your personal space. His hands are starting to touch you, you hear his voice & feel his breath on you, warm & intense.
The way his lips are so close to hers as he speaks, “Didn’t you miss me?”
You can taste his words. His breath on you causing a tingling sensation in parts of your body that have not been touched in a long while. His nose is working too, touch you ever so lightly, getting you use to the closeness that has not been felt in a while.
She is losing her mind as memories come back. She remembers the feel of him. That touch you feel deep in your soul, it makes you feel God & scream for Jesus.
She missed him(bitch, you lying…you was getting finger fucked on the beach & drinking wine, when you think about Fitz let alone miss him?)
I missed him. Tony got me needing him like a kid with asthma needs their inhaler…MY BREATH IS CAUGHT. I CAN’T FUCKING BREATHE!
She came. I came. We all just puddles fucking with Tony.
Okay, I’m getting a little hot & bothered so let’s move on. As you can see from the gifs up top, Olivia stops the kiss telling him how she can’t do this. He asks her why not & she informs him that she didn’t go away alone. Fitz takes a step back & looks at her. He then states that she left with Jake. She confirms with a yes & he makes her say it.
I am glad that Olivia told him the truth because it is better that he hears it from her than anyone else. I also feel like it was necessary because this is the thing that gives Fitz a little pause. He was ready to jump back in with the love of his life. Knowing this is the thing that allows him to step back into reality. Now they can go back to trying to fix their shit separately.
After she says that she left with Jake, Fitz says something like, heavy is the head that wears the crown. Olivia goes to him & this happens
Okay, let me say this: I understand why Fitz grabbed her wrist & in no way do I see this as abusive BUT this shit is so problematic & I’m going to need for it not to happen again.
He just found out that the love of his life left him at the lowest point in his life to run off with someone who use to be a friend. She left him for another man & lied about it(because earlier she had told him that she went alone). He doesn’t want her touching him. I get it & for the moment, the feelings that were there, & the scene, it was a natural response BUT the writers got to fucking chill with this shit. I feel like the writers are trying to continue with their ‘Fitz is the devil’ & Jake is the best guy theme by having Fitz touch her while being angry. The main problem a lot of people have with Jacob is that he has put his hands on Liv so what do we do to make Fitz be the devil that the writers seem to think that is…have him touch her in a way that can be perceived to be violent. Yes, this wasn’t keeping someone from leaving your house while having the person go flying through a table & getting a concussion that sends you to the hospital or a choke but this wrist grab was enough to get an “ow” so it was noticeable & damn problematic.
All of this shit is to make Fitz Satan, Jake look like a ninja in aluminum foil, Mellie is saint sucking dick who stayed with ol drunk ass, daddy issue having ass, borderline abusive ass Fitz. Oh & Olivia ain’t shit cause everyone & their damn aunties, cousins, sisters, mothers, granddaughter can touch her.
Fuck this shit. Fuck it with a sick dick. Fuck it to hell so Satan can fuck them with his red hot dick. Just FUCK IT ALL!
I’m not here for it. I could be wrong but this is just what I feel is being done. I personally think that they should have Olivia & Fitz stay clean the fuck away from each other, rather than to try to paint Fitz with the brush that won’t produce a damn masterpiece. Matter of fact, how about we just stop having people touch Olivia Pope in general? That would be nice. That would be great. Kay, thanks.
Yeah, this review has went long enough so I’m going to stop now.